This last month, I’ve been in the car driving a lot for my current job and I’ve been seeing this license plate around that states “My body, My choice” and it got me thinking: How much control do I really have over my own body?
How much choice do I really have over my own body? How much choice does anyone have over their own body? And after much reflection, I’ve come to the conclusion that choice over what happens to my body is really an illusion. It’s something we tell ourselves so that we feel that we are in more control of our lives than we really are. I have very little choice over what happens to my body or even in my body for that matter. I have no choice over my genetics, the diseases or disorders I may develop over time. I have little choice over whether or not I develop polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS), familial hypertention (high blood pressure), allergies of any kind (food, environment, medications), or if one day my body decides to attack itself and I develop an autoimmune disorder. What about infertility or cancer or birth defects? I have no choice as to whether someone decides to swerve into my lane and hit my vehicle. I have no choice in how someone else treats me (physically or verbally). I have no choice if I develop a mental health disorder like depression, bipolar, schizophrenia, etc….
The truth is I have very little choice over what happens to my body but what I do have is choices over how I react to what is going on inside my body or what has happened to me by the hand of someone else. I have the power to choose my response to whatever comes my way. I can choose everyday to make choices that will benefit my body by participating in self care activities (eating healthy, relaxing, exercising, etc…). When someone treats me with disrespect I can choose to walk away from that relationship. If someone tries to harm me, I don’t have to stay. I can leave. I can call the authorities and do what ever else I need to do to protect myself.
I do have choices in every situation. Some are culturally popular, some not. I can whine and complain that other people have a better life than me, that this is the way I am and do nothing to change my situation, even if that change makes things just 1% better. I can choose to believe the negativity that people spew at me or let their words fuel my desire to be different, to rise above their expectations, to believe in myself. I can choose to eat that bag of chips or that bag of carrots. I can choose to sit on my butt and binge watch my favorite show or get up and exercise. My choices in life aren’t about controlling what happens to me physically but about choosing how I want to respond when things happen or don’t happen to me. I can’t say “blood pressure, now you have to be normal today” or “menstrual cramps,you are no longer going to be painful, get in line.” But I can choose to surround myself with people who love and care about me. I can choose to never touch a drop of alcohol. I can choose to put my phone down while I’m driving so that if someone does come at me on the road I am prepared to act.
Every day we wake up and make choices but we also have to realize that there are so many moving parts. There are so many other people involved in our day to day who are also making choices, just like we are. They may choose to do something to us that we wish they hadn’t or that we are delighted that they did. We don’t have as much autonomy as we tell ourselves we do but we do get to choose how we react to the situations that we are in.
The Ruby Blossom 