Mary, the mother of Jesus, is probably one of the most well-known female characters of the Bible. There is no question that Mary was a special woman and there are many different lessons that her life could teach us about being a mother. However, I want to focus on one lesson that probably many people have never thought about: releasing your idea of how your child should be fulfilling their ministry or calling.
There are many prophecies concerning Jesus’ conception, gestation, birth, identity, ministry on earth, and death [Check out Luke 1 & 2 and Matthew 1 & 2 for a more complete story of Jesus conception and birth]. Some scholars believe there are over 300 prophecies regarding Jesus in the Old Testament (Jesus Film Project). JesusFilm.org mentions 55 of these prophesies and where the fulfillment of them are mentioned in the New Testament. Not to mention all the many signs that accompanied His life. With so many prophecies about Jesus you would think that once the messiah would appear there would be no question about what he would do on the earth but as we read through the Gospels we discover that there were many different ideas about how the Messiah should act and what he would accomplish. Jesus challenged the ideas of the Sadducees, Pharisees, Zealots, Herodians, and at times even his own disciples and family. In fact, in two of the four Gospel accounts (Mark & John) Mary is hardly mentioned and when she is mentioned there seems to be negative overtones concerning her and the rest of Jesus’ earthly family. I think that there is even some biblical evidence that Mary, though she heard some of these prophecies directly from Jewish prophets or messengers (like Anna & Simeon) and Angels, had some different ideas from time to time of what Jesus should be doing on the earth that contrasted with what Jesus was actually doing.
- The first hint we get of this could possibly be in Luke 2:33-35, “His father and mother were amazed at what was being said about Him. 34 Then Simeon blessed them and told His mother Mary: ‘Indeed, this child is destined to cause the fall and rise of many in Israel and to be a sign that will be opposed— 35 and a sword will pierce your own soul—that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed.’” First off, Mary and Joseph both were visited by Angels prior to Jesus’ birth. Joseph was told that Jesus was conceived by the Holy Spirit and was going to save His people from their sins (Matt 1:20-21). While Mary was told that He would be called the Son of God, the Son of the Most High, and that He would rule on David’s throne forever (Luke 1:28-35). After, each of them being visited by an Angel, I am surprised that they were both amazed by what people had to say about Jesus as an infant. But it is unclear if Joseph and Mary ever shared with each other what the Angels had said to them about Jesus individually. Joseph was told Jesus was going to save the Jews from their sin, while Mary was told Jesus was going to rule on David’s throne forever. In verse 34 Simeon is talking about the salvation that would be made available through Christ and that many Jews will oppose Him while others will welcome Him. At the time, many believed that when the Messiah came, He would overturn the Roman rule and set the Israelites free to rule themselves as a sovereign nation. When it later became clear that Jesus had no intention of overthrowing Rome, many turned on him and demanded His death. Verse 35 warns Mary of the her own pain she would suffer watching her son die, yet at the time she did not understand what Simeon had meant by the words he said. Each person was given information on just part of Jesus’ purpose on the earth, no one got a full explanation of how He was to accomplish each of these purposes or ever when they would happen.
2. Years later we get another glimpse into Mary’s understanding of who Jesus was. When Jesus was 12 years old he stayed behind asking and answering questions in the Temple after His parents had visited Jerusalem for the Passover (Luke 2:41-51). At the time, His parents did not realize that he was not traveling in their group and had to go back and search for Him in the city for 3 days! THREE DAYS! ALONE! WITH NOTHING! I’m sure they were livid when they found Him, asking “Son, why have You treated us like this? We’ve been searching anxiously for You.” Yet, even at 12 years old, it appears Jesus had a clear understanding of who He was and what He needed to be doing. He replied, “why were you searching for me? Didn’t you know that I had to be in My Father’s house?” However, His parent’s were completely clueless about what He had said to them. Before Mary approaches Jesus to talk to Him, scripture says that they (His parents) were astonished when they found Him. Some questions that arises when I read this passage are: what exactly did Mary and Joseph find astonishing about this situation? Was it the fact that Jesus seemed in his element? Were they astonished that He didn’t seem bothered to be apart from them? Was it the astounded crowds that Jesus had attracted in the Temple that they were surprised by? Was it something else? We aren’t told the answer, we are only told of their response to the situation: astonishment and confusion.
3. In John 2:1-12 we find out that Jesus first miracle was not initiated by Him but by His mother Mary. This miracle is when Jesus turns water into wine at a wedding (for a deeper understanding of the meaning of this miracle click here). In short, Mary comes to Jesus and tells Him that the Bride and Groom have ran out of wine (a huge social blunder). Jesus basically tells her the matter has nothing to do with Him and that His hour has not yet come (John 2:4). Jesus was referring to his death and resurrection in this statement and about revealing His glory. In the passage, it appears Mary completely ignores His comment and tells the servants to do what Jesus says and Jesus graciously obeys her request at this time. Though the statements are brief I think it reveals a discrepancy between Mary’s idea of what Jesus should be doing and what Jesus was actually suppose to be doing. She wanted Him to fix the situation while in return Jesus used it to teach a lesson about why He had truly come to earth: to cleanse the inside of us and bring abundant life to all who would put their faith in Him not just to do good works.
4. Another passage that reveals this discrepancy between ideals of Jesus’ calling and ministry is in Mark 3:20-35. In this passage, Jesus had a huge crowd show up at the house He was staying at. Verse 21 tells us that when His family heard about what was going on they thought He was “out of His mind” and went to stop Him from doing what He was doing. In verse 31 His mother, brothers, and sisters (vs 32) show up at the house and ask Him to come out. They make an attempt to stop Him but Jesus doesn’t budge. He begins to discuss the topic of spiritual family instead. At this moment He probably shocked everyone in the house listening to Him for not immediately leaving the house to meet them. The passage never tells us if Jesus heeds their calls but does end the chapter by saying that His family are those who do God’s will (vs 35). This passage always makes me think of how those closest to Jesus; His mother, brothers, and sisters did believe in who He said He was. I don’t blame His siblings for their unbelief. They didn’t have angels tell them who their eldest brother was. There may have been sibling revelry between the brothers like in many families. Maybe they blamed Jesus for their family’s reputation in the community, since Mary was pregnant with Jesus prior to being married, and now Jesus was attracting all this attention. Even Jesus in all four gospels mentions that a prophet has no honor in his hometown or among His family (John 4:44, Luke 4:16-30, Matthew 13:54-58, and Mark 6:1-6).
I personally think that it wasn’t until Jesus death and more specifically His resurrection that Mary grasped a fuller and more complete understanding of who her son was: God in the flesh and His purpose on the earth. Luke 19:26 tells us Mary was near the cross when He died. His death surely pierced her soul and revealed even her own heart to herself. Also, it is not until Acts 1:14, that we find for the first time Mary and the rest of her sons, being mentioned as being “continually united in prayer” with the other disciples and female followers. Jesus even personally went to James, His brother after Jesus resurrected (1 Corinthians 15:7). A full reading of the Gospels and Acts shows Mary’s faith and by mentioning a few times of her own astonishment at what was said about her son, even after the amazing announcement to her from the Angel of the Lord, and showing a few instances of when Mary may have had inaccurate ideas about what her son should be doing while on earth, shows us her growth as a believer and her humanness.
Mary was not some super human, who got everything right. Only Jesus can claim the title of spotless and perfect. However, she did get a lot of things right. She had that faith that grew from a small seed into a mustard tree, we must remember that just as trees need time to grow from a seed to a fully mature tree, so does our faith. Somewhere along Mary’s journey in understanding who her son was, whatever cultural influences of what the Messiah should be doing and how He would act needed to be refined and reformed. The same is true for us as mother’s today.
We do not have the luxury or the burden of knowing all the details of God’s plan for the lives of our children. We may not always understand what God is calling our children to or how He wants to use our children to accomplish what He has called them to: their specific purpose/calling/ministry. However, we can help set the stage for our kids to learn to listen to the call of the Holy Spirit and learn how to respond to that call. Starting at birth we nurture them, teach them, show them, guide them. As they get older we leave them room to try ‘it’ out on their own in small ways. As they continue to grow and mature we give them more and more space. That way when it’s time, we can release them to embark on life’s journey independently with confidence; while being available for continued guidance, prayer, and support.
There will be no other child born on earth to be the propitiation of sin for the whole world. Not every believer is called to missions overseas. But every believer is called to live their life to glorify God and point others to Christ in all that they do. Some may be called to prestigious careers; blue collar jobs or white collar jobs. Some may be called to being stay at home mothers, even if just for a season. Some may be called to politics, health care, computer science, math, physics, gas station attendance, teachers, cashiers, wait staff, etc… Our children don’t have to make $100K a year to make an impact in the Kingdom. They just have to learn to listen to the still small voice of the Holy Spirit and obey His voice. Mary’s impact came when she listened, accepted, obeyed what God had asked of her. Jesus’ impact happened because He had learned to follow the Holy Spirit’s guidance and instructions. Our impact and that of our children’s is also dependent on listening and obeying the Holy Spirit. Even when that means laying down our own ideas of what that should look like.
Then Jesus replied, “I assure you: The Son is not able to do anything on His own, but only what He sees the Father doing. For whatever the Father does, the Son also does these things in the same way. For the Father loves the Son and shows Him everything He is doing, and He will show Him greater works than these so that you will be amazed. John 5:19-20




